Missing Memory

You won't know him, "Uncle Mikey". You won't remember him. You could barely hold your head up when he died. Funny guy that Mikey. He was the best Brother-In-Law I never had. Would have been the 'cool' Uncle to you, like I had w/Uncle Doug. Probably would have taught you to have people pull your finger and then fart. You would have looked up to him and wanted him to take you for a ride on his "moped". Your Auntie Jenn loved him very much and probably still does. And probably always will. He had big blue eyes and a crooked smile, with dark hair and had big tattoos that you probably would have been fascinated with. Poking him in the arm and then running away from him, giggling with gleeful fright.

He was only 25 years old when he died. Too young. Our whole family struggled with the very idea that he was gone, all of us aching with our hearts in slings for Auntie Jenn and Mikey's family too. I happen to believe that God will only give us as much as we can handle, and apparently, the people who knew and loved Mikey can handle a LOT. A lot more than I'm comfortable with.

The service was at the Harvest Church in Riverside and it was the nicest and saddest service I could have dreamt of. There was live music, and his bike in the front with his helmet and boots, flowers and the whole place was filled with people. The slide show of pictures played with songs from the heart was wrenching. Drawing out tears like a salve does with poison. Stinging with pain and laughing with joy at the funny antics Mikey would pull.

Then the picture of Mikey and Jenn holding you. That will be your missing memory. It is hard even still, nearly two months later to even look at the picture without tears. You won't know the grief, the pain, and the saddest thing is, you won't know his laugh, his humor, his sincerity, and funny enough, his farts.